Minding My Miracles

~ and finding new mercies every morning

Archive for the category “Personal Challenges”

In the throws of it

Today, I am feeling a little like I am buried in the grumpies. For some reason my boys decided that they didn’t want to do anything the easy way because of course we had something we needed to get done today that was out of the house.  It seemed like we were struggling every moment of our trip from whose sitting on which side of the cart to who can touch the most things going down the aisle.  Oh, and let’s not forget how much fun out is to make our voices echo off the ceiling of our favorite warehouse store as mom holds her head down in shame trying to hide her eyes from everyone around all the while hissing threats about the coming consequences.  And then there was the screaming -I don’t want to listen to these songs- at the top of your lungs over and over as mom just turned the radio louder on the way home.  All followed by -I want you Mommy.  We won’t even go into the lunch that followed.  All I can say is that hearing your two year old say -NO, I WILL NOT- and then biting me… was more than this mom wanted to experience.  Fortunately, I did okay in keeping my temper under wraps (although I could feel it bubbling under the surface the whole time) and the boys are now sleeping the much needed sleep of the weary.
Perhaps its because my Bible reading for today was Jeremiah 4-6 and Isaiah 18 in which God was telling Israel all the things that were going to happen.  I clearly remember how it said that a bunch of disaster was going to happen and it sounded like that was the end of everything (as in civilization was being wiped out) and then He said, no there’s more.  I mean God had seriously lost His temper and with good reason.  His children are the most whiney little brats that ever there were.  We are those same children.  We think its okay to wake up on the wrong side of the bed and just complain, fight and tell God no all day.  All the while expecting Him to meet our every need and not only our needs, but our wants too.  We are some selfish spoiled kids and He loves us anyway.  In spite of it all.  Jesus came and we no longer have to see God lose His temper at us.  Sure there are still consequences for what we do, but God is not mad at us in any way for anything.  We can be grumpy.  We can be irritable.  W can lose our tempers and throw fits. We can tell him NO over and over and over again and He will patiently try to explain to us that He loves us so much and only wants the best for us.  He will give us chance after chance after chance to get it right. He will meet all of our needs and go above and beyond for us.  He holds us through our storms and brings us peace.
Man, I want to parent the way God does.  Even when we hurt Him, He doesn’t turn to us in anger.  He simply holds us closer.  He whispers softly in our ear about His great love for us. On the way to the store we listened to a song about how nothing can separate us from the love God has for us in Christ Jesus.  No attitudes, no back talking, no embarrassing behavior will ever separate from that love.  We are loved with an everlasting love.
We can choose to live out of that love or to hide out from it.  I can choose to parent out of it or parent out of my own weaknesses.  I know what brings about better results. I know Who brings about better results.  I want to be like Him. I want to parent like Him. Please teach me Lord…gently. Thank you.
Praying you know that you are not alone today. May you find yourself
“Miraculously Blessed” ,
Jessica

No Limits

Dear Ones,
Sadly, I must admit that I live a life filled with limits. Many are real, but not necessary. Although some are dictated by this world we live in, most are self-imposed. I am so tired of limits that stop me from doing the things that would lead to a much fuller life. And so, I am going to really look at my life, reflect on what I see and step out in faith that I really can do the things that are in my heart. My heart soars into places that I have not dared to step. When I begin to allow myself to dream the dreams hidden inside I get goosebumps of excitement. There is no limit to these things. There is instead incredible freedom that goes beyond where I have ever gone before. I would like to invite you to enter the land of dreams coming true with me. It’s a dare to go deeper and farther than you’ve allowed yourself before. No more self imposed limits… no more holding yourself to the place of rigid fear. Just do it.
Miraculously Blessed-
Jessica

Monumental part ONE

The theater was fairly quiet as we all gathered into our seats.  No one coming really knew what to expect. We were here for many different reasons.  Perhaps because all of us want to be assured simply that “we are not alone.”  As I stood holding baby boy waiting for the usual movie-time treats to arrive I reflected on what had come before.

This day hadn’t gone quite as planned.  First of all things had been so busy that a shower hadn’t happened until much later than I desired.  The boys were a bit whiney and didn’t really care to take their naps.  Which is never exciting for mama, but especially on the days when that nap time is so needed.  Finally nap time had come.  I just need 10 minutes to myself I thought.  But of course then came a phone call I couldn’t turn away followed by baby boy waking up needing mama again and really leaving me no options of time to prepare or relax.  But then Daddy came home and Mama hightailed it into the shower.  (I have never been one of those girls who spends hours getting ready for a date, but even so only having 15-20 minutes makes me a little sad.)

When I returned from my shower I found the oldest boy snuggled up with his daddy watching a show.  And then came the dilemma, do we wake up middle boy since it is the end of nap-time or do we let him sleep longer since he fell asleep so late.  It was decided that he should continue to sleep until Mama was ready.    Middle brother can be the sweetest angel or the scariest monster depending on his mood.  Because he likes things a certain way and it isn’t always a way that makes sense to the rest of us sometimes doing the simple things with him can be so time-consuming.  And today was not destined to be any different.

Since my mom had agreed to watch the boys for this date it was not such an urgency to have the boys just so before we left.  A diaper did need to be changed though.  So, with only 5 minutes before we were to leave we began the process.  This was not enough time and I knew it.

We are going through what I hope is a phase with middle brother that is waging war on my heart.  Before I had kids I had no idea what a strong-willed child was.  And once I had firstborn I still didn’t know. I assumed that strong-willed children were firstborn children.  And then our firstborn was so relatively easy that I believed we’d dodged the bullet.  Oh, how wrong I was.  Firstborn arrived on his due date of all things which I guess is pretty rare.  As a little one he was mostly compliant and his desire to help and please was and is a delight to me.  Now don’t get me wrong, he is far from perfect.  We go through things with him all the time and now that he has two other brothers he doesn’t get everything he wants and there can be issues with that.  Overall though he is easy-peasy-lemon-squeezy as he is willing to bend in the long run.

Mr. Number 2 is anything but easy.  His name means Fair Warrior and he certainly is.  It often seems like most things he does comes with a war.  He carries this picture in his mind of how things should be and to deviate from that path would bring about the end of the world as he knows it.  Oh, how I wish I could see that picture.  It would make life so much smoother, because I honestly cannot understand why things must be just so sometimes.  I really don’t even know if strong will is strong enough to describe him.  I so don’t want to look at everything I do with this boy as being a battle and that is a prayer I often pray – that God would help me to see things in another way.  I know God has great things for this boy – the boy who can charm the skin off a snake and then turn around and eat it for dinner.

Back to the story –  So, we began mission diaper change.  It was not what he wanted to do at that moment.  (I bend to things with him when I can, but children also need to learn that they cannot always get their way.)  You would have thought that all hell had broken loose the way he lost it.  He certainly wasn’t holding back.  There was kicking and screaming and hitting and yelling and crying to the point of coughing and the sounds of throwing up that by a miracle he managed to keep inside.  When this happens it really breaks me.  I want to hold my baby and give him everything he wants.  I want to understand where the disconnect is coming from so I can soothe the upset and make everything alright again.  In the same moment sometimes I just want to throw him out the window.  I hate that I feel that way.  I love him so much, but sometimes when he hurts me I am really hurt and the negative side of me has a desire to react.  And in fact this night I did react, not with physical actions, but with words.  I spoke words over my son that I will never get back.  I have though them before, but I have never spoken them.  I called him a  brat.  Oh, I would give anything to take that word back.  My children are not brats.  I hate describing them in any negative way especially to them.  My hearts’ desire is to only speak life over my children and here I said that.  That was the end of it for me.  I was lost for a time.  My mom said to just go, she would handle him.  I didn’t want to leave.  I didn’t want to make anyone have to deal with that and I didn’t want to leave my little boy in the place that we were at.  But, we were running late (according to my time…which is a different clock then my husband runs on, but that’s another story) and we had to go.  I held this weeping boy (who by the way hadn’t even heard the words I’d said he was yelling so loud) and told him I loved him and would see him later.

We got into the car with #3 who was pretty upset from all the noise and was adding his own chorus to our night.  I did not want to go.  I wasn’t in the mood to be happy and try to pretend everything was alright.  We almost turned back, but husband wanted to go so bad and it has been months and months since we saw a movie that I was torn in wanting to go for him.  Plus, we weren’t going to see just any old movie.  This was a live event that we wouldn’t have the opportunity to see again in the theater…at least at this time. (I really hope that changes, but more to come on that.)

As we pulled into the movie theater parking lot there was a lot of wisdom to be seen.  I kept looking for people our age, hoping that maybe there are others like us.  Truth be told it was a movie playing at 5:30 and most of my working friends aren’t even home from work by that time so I am not that surprised there were so few of us. (I did see a few more come into the room right before things started.)  Fortunately the theater opened a second screen or we would have been out of luck as the movie was sold out even before this day.  And here we are back to where I started this story and I haven’t gotten to the good stuff yet, but this post is long.  Hundreds of words longer than I aim for.  So, I will edit the title and this will be part one of a story I am itching to tell you.  I hope you will join me again to hear about one of the most amazing experiences of my life.

Miraculously Blessed,

Jessica

When miracles are sleeping

Good Morning Dear Ones –

I am grabbing a few minutes here while my miracles are still curled up in their beds to share with you some thoughts that have been on my mind.  Like a freight train America is careening towards Christmas and in some places it seems like we could miss Thanksgiving altogether.  It does appear that there is one “holiday” (and I used that term with all the sarcasm I can muster at this early hour) still to arrive before Christmas and that is Black Friday.  Oh sure, I love a good deal as much as the next mom, but there is something special about Thanksgiving that seems to be rushed past.

It’s almost like the whole idea of being grateful has disappeared.  Oh, not necessarily in word, but in pace.  It feels like in our hearts we no longer take the time to slow down, look around and see what we truly have.  Often we don’t even take a short minute.  I have been oh-so-guilty of this.  And it’s true, I do have some valid excuses.  Being hugely pregnant, chasing around 2 active boys, trying to get a house moved and cleaned and closed on before baby comes, trying to get a new space organized and the list goes on.  This list of excuses that tempts me to complain rather than praise.  This list of excuses that draws me into the dark rather than shining the light.  This is where I could focus.  I could forget about all the amazing things that are happening and in fact for a period of time this weekend I did.  I allowed the frustration and hormonal imbalance to take over.  I stepped off of solid ground into the quicksand of depression.  Things weren’t going my way.  I hurt.  I wasn’t getting everything I wanted.  Nobody was listening to me.  I hurt.  I feel alone.  There is so much to do and I have no energy to do it and if I don’t do it, well, there is nobody else to do it.  I just need a break.  I just need some peace and quiet.  I hurt.  Not quite sure why I was wanting to spend my time focusing on these things.  They did nothing but drag me deeper.  Sadly, I wasn’t even looking for a rescue rope to pull me out of my pit.  I think I may have a had a shovel to dig myself in deeper.

I was not looking for blessings.  I was not grateful/thankful for anything.  Have you been there?  Please tell me I am not alone.  Please tell me that in some form or another you have been there and done that.  Well, even if you haven’t it’s possible you might find yourself there and I just want to encourage you that not drowning in the hole of self-pity (justified or not) is way better than drowning there.  If you are looking for a place to drown I can offer a suggestion.  Take a dive off the highest cliff of pain you have in your life right into the amazing sea of love that waits for you.  Suck in the water of life.  Literally breathe it in.  This, my friends, this is drowning.  This is where you allow everything you’ve focused on to be pushed out with only the one thought…”I want to live.  I want to live free.”

Thanksgiving is a choice.  Our American ancestors could have spent that first thanksgiving mourning their losses and looking at all the things they didn’t have.  They could have argued and complained their way through the beginnings of their new lives and probably some of them did opt for that route. The life they chose was not easy.  They gave up more than I think many of us can even imagine.  They lost more than many of us may ever know.  And yet, they took the time to count their blessings.  They refused to let go of the promise that God had given them of freedom.  Some things are worth the most valuable treasure we have.  Some prices are worth paying.

And the counting.  That is the most miraculous part.  Somehow, when you being to count your blessings; when you begin to turn your complaints into thanksgivings all that is truly of value seems to multiply.  Suddenly the list of garbage does not seem so big.  Suddenly the mountain of pain is not so insurmountable.  Suddenly, you are soaring with eagles wings over it all.  Imagine this – Light begins to surge through your darkness…just a small flicker at first.  Maybe it’s the flame of a candle in a large dark room.  Then suddenly you are holding a flashlight in your hands and even though shadows are all around you can see.  Next you find a lamp and it drives the darkness from a corner or two of the room and then…oh, then comes the pure joy.  The floodlights are thrown on and hope releases the aroma of freshness.  There is no more darkness.  Not only can you clearly see your blessings, but you can taste them and feel them and dance with them.  It’s a new day.  This is what thanksgiving is all about.  This is what Thanksgiving Day can be all about.  This year instead of rushing through to get to the next “holiday”, stop and live in this moment of grace.  Think on the sacrifice that was paid for your freedom.  Find at least one little thing to be thankful for and allow it to grow.  Let yourself dive into love and drown in it.  I can tell you that this light of thanksgiving is much more satisfying than any darkness of mourning.

If you haven’t gotten it yet, Ann Voscamp has a free APP for One Thousand Gifts that I encourage you to add to your phone.  Maybe it will help you take that first step out of darkness.   http://bit.ly/vG6I6O

Praying you find the freedom of thankfulness this holiday.  Matthew 11:28

Miraculously Blessed,

Jessica

Slowing down so I don’t miss the stop sign…

Dear Ones –

My family has been moving into a new house for the last month.  Between the old house and the new house there is a road with a stop sign that could be easy to miss.  It’s one of those very low traffic roads.  I have been in the car with another family member who missed it and drove through the intersection without stopping.  Another admitted to me that they have also missed that particular sign.  To be truthful, I can see how one could miss this sign and I don’t really know why it is at the spot it is.  There is a street right after it that seems the same and has no stop sign.  So far, even with my driving distractions (kids), I have not missed it, but if I don’t stay slow…it could happen.

I am 36 weeks pregnant this week.  This pregnancy has flown by.  Part of it I’m sure is that we didn’t tell many for so long and in the not telling some of the realness of the pregnancy didn’t hit us for quite some time.  Yesterday we had our 36th week appointment and a tour of a possible hospital we could have the baby at.  On the drive home Jordan said to me, “It just hit me that in 4 weeks I am going to be a father of three boys.”  Talk about a stop and take notice sign.

We have been trying to sell our old house and in fact close on the 23rd of this month.  YAY!  Thank you God for getting this done for us before this baby comes.  (My prayer of hopefulness.)  Which has meant moving into the new location and out of the old during this pregnancy, not to mention all the construction going on.  It has been exhausting things have been speeding along.  Lately it seems I can barely keep my eyes open longer than the kids at night.  There is so much to do, but time is ticking away.  When the piles add up and we have so much to do, how do we stop working our way through them to stop when we see those little red signs in life?

I wish I was better at slowing down and appreciating life.  Seems like when I slow down I get stuck.  Have you ever read the book Oh, the Places You’ll Go by Dr, Seuss?  Seriously, one of my favorite books.  Part of it talks about “the waiting place”.  This is that place that it is easy to get stuck in.  You start waiting around for something and then you just wait and wait and wait, becoming stagnant.  No thank you.  I really want to work on my stops becoming intentional times.  As in, I intentionally stop to notice things, to become more aware, to appreciate and value things.  I think you get stuck waiting and get lazy when you aren’t intentional about the stopping.

Sometimes, it is really hard to live life intentionally.  Jordan and I were talking the other day about the beautiful scenery we were noticing as we were driving.  I said to him that there was a job I used to have that had around 30 minutes of beautiful scenery driving everyday, but some days I would get to work and I did not even remember driving at all.  Scary, huh?  When routine, mundane or the busy-ness of life makes things disappear we miss opportunities to really live.  It’s funny how a simple stop sign can make you wake up and notice.  I’ll tell you what though, if you’re the one driving the opposite way and somebody else misses one it can be a real wake-up call to you.  Suddenly you can find yourself swerving, honking or worse.  Your blood starts pumping and for the rest your drive you notice everything.  Wouldn’t it be great if life was lived more that way…intentionally stopping and taking notice?  Really feeling alive and not from fear, but with intention.

For me I really want to see my kids.  I don’t want their childhood to be the background noise to everything else I have going on.  I was watching Michelle Duggar this week talk about how she stays calm with her kids and why.  She said she wants her children’s hearts.  Those simple words impacted me so much…because that’s what I want too.  I want my children’s hearts to be turned to the Father.  I want them to know love…real love.  The love their Creator and their family has for them as well as how to give love.  I don’t see how they can know this without being a priority.  If we are driving through life like maniacs and never slow down and stop to listen to their voices, their needs, their hearts how can we ever expect them to stop living at a break neck speed and experience the wonder life has to offer?  How can we ever expect to capture their hearts?  I contend we can’t.  So for me, once again, I am stopping at the stop sign I see on my horizon and re-prioritizing.  Everything about the house will be done at some point.  This baby is going to come when he is ready to come and no amount of preparation will ever change that.  If my heart is full of love and my tank is full of gas (to get me to the hospital) nothing else HAS to be done.

May I ask that you take a look and see if there are any stop signs in your life you’ve been speeding through.  If there are, be encouraged that stopping is a good option.  Make the most of your slow down and be intentional in seeing life around you.  If this is something you are already good at, I would love it if you would lift me up in your prayers that I wouldn’t lose sight of what is most important.

Miraculously Blessed,

Jessica

Peace…is it hard to find?

Dear Ones –

We often talk about the peace before the storm.  In our house this usually means afternoon nap time.  Which is often followed by pure craziness as I prepare dinner and the kids go a little nuts waiting for it.  And when the kids go nut, mama is not far behind.  This period (often referred to in our house as the crazy hour) is known as THE STORM.

There is just something about a storm that has the ability to throw everything out of whack.  Tempers fly and the ugliest sounds are heard.  There is crying (on all parts) and nothing is very fun.  Then comes dinnertime and we all try to forget what just happened and pray.  Haha  It’s hard to be grateful for a meal when you are frustrated and irritated.  It’s hard to relax enough to take in a “feast” when you’re so worn out from the battle that you just throw the food in without appreciating the blessing of having food on your table.

And I know I am the worst culprit when it comes to all of this.  Sure, I can use the pregnant excuse.  As in…I’m pregnant so I’m tired and I’m sick of doing it all.  Notice a theme in that sentence?  “I’m”  – it’s all about me.  The truth of it is that life isn’t meant to be lived about me.  And the other truth is that in service I can find peace before, during and after the storm.

When focused on my family I actually take the stress off of myself.  So, now comes the challenge for me.  This is what I’m thinking.  I’m thinking that I need to come up with specific focused activities for my kids to do while I am putting dinner together instead of just open play time.  They have lots of open play time during the day already.  I need to anticipate what they are going to need.  Having vegetables cut up and ready for pre-dinner snacking will keep them from whining “I’m hungry”…cause if I hear that one more time…

And for me, the most important thing I can do is have dinner mostly ready so I am not spending an hour in the kitchen as their little tummies growl.  So, it’s back to the planing drawing board.  I’ve decided that I need to schedule some things in my life…including nap time for mom (hey, my nurse told me this is a must for me).

And because I am searching to bring more peace into my household I am turning outside of myself for help.  One of the main places I am searching is you.  Do you have ideas on fun, mostly clean, needing little supervision activities that I can set-up for my kids to do as I put dinner together?  My guys are 3 1/2 and 18 months.  I have been searching Pinterest and finding all kinds of great ideas, but I would really love to hear from those of you in the trenches.

As I create some more structure in my home, I am going to focus on Psalm 23 because let’s face it…this is true peace.  He has it all worked out for me and in that I will find all that I need.

The LORD is my shepherd;
I shall not want.
He makes me to lie down in green pastures;
He leads me beside the still waters.
He restores my soul;
He leads me in the paths of righteousness
For His name’s sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil;
For You are with me;
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
You anoint my head with oil;
My cup runs over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
All the days of my life;
And I will dwell in the house of the LORD
Forever.

Miraculously Blessed,

Jessica

The Rote Way to Pray

Dear Ones –

(Disclaimer: After I wrote this one of my readers commented that they were unfamiliar with the word -rote- so, just in case you are… routine; a fixed, habitual, or mechanical course of procedure  from memory, without thought of the meaning; in a mechanical way)

I was without kids for a while today and thought that maybe I would try to catch up with a few people I hadn’t talked to in quite a while.  However it seemed everyone I called today was unavailable.  Which meant I listened to a lot of messages.

As I was listening it struck me that there was a common theme between them all.  And it was more than that they all needed to convey the same message.  They actually said the same thing…”This is so and so.  I’m unavailable right now, but if you leave your name and number I will call you back as soon as I can.”.  It’s like there is a formula for answering messages and so many people just blindly follow the formula.

And I must say that it’s just fine to do that.  Sure some people have messages that make you bored or laugh or just plain wonder what you are listening to, but plain Old Jane still works.  Even my parents answering message works, if you, the listener are willing to listen for a very, very long time…  (One day our #2 got his little fingers on their machine and managed to record several minutes of background talking and his own personal noises.)

Anyway, while I was thinking about message styles I started to think about praying and how some people pray that way too.  Some people pray the same words every day.  I know as parents this can sometimes just happen to you cause you’re teaching your kids to pray and in trying to build the concept you use the same words over and over everyday.  I think mealtime prayers and bedtime prayers are the most common to fall prey to these prayers.  And when you teach your kids to pray it IS the concept that you are trying to teach. (Currently our #1 prays for his little brother’s hurting teeth every night because that is apparently the only nice prayer he could think of to pray in regards to his brother one night and it stuck. “Dear Jesus, Please heal F’s teeth because they’re growing and they hurt him. Thank you Jesus. Amen”)

But what about you?  Have your prayers fallen into the rote rut?  Do you have real conversation with God or are you just praying the same prayers and words everyday?  Have you fallen into the mundane routine that happens when we are just performing our rituals instead of making a point to really talk?

Yes, Jesus did teach the Lord’s Prayer to us.  Yes, those words are life filling and a great starting point to speak with God.  The thing is that Jesus didn’t stop with only those words.  He spoke His whole heart.  He shared and He listened and it was not just tradition; it was beyond.  There are beautiful things about traditional prayers that can take us into a deep place with God.  However, it’s when we heart connect that we are really praying.

After all, in Psalms we are reminded over and over again to make a joyful noise before the Lord (Psalms 66:1, 81:1, 95:1,95:2, 98:4, 98:6, 100:1).    I think this means more than just making noise or saying certain words.  I believe it means to let your heart speak.

The other problem with rote praying is that it can often be mindless.  Rote praying can have happened so many times that we don’t even have to think about the words that are coming out of our mouths.  They just fall out ’cause that is what we are supposed to be saying.  When this happens we are doing an injustice not only to ourselves, but to the prayer itself.  Prayer is a conversation not a recitation.

All this thinking has got me thinking about my prayer time.  How much of it is what I do because it is what I do?  How much is connection?  This is something I want to keep in the forefront of my mind.  I want to remember these thoughts and make changes where things have gotten sleepy.  Want to join me and take a look at yours?  I want to go beyond the concept of prayer time with my kids and begin to work more on specific connection time.  Anybody up for joining me?  I will be interested to see if I see a difference in my life…especially my thought life.  I’m ready to be more consistently full of joyful noise.  Shoot me a note if you want to keep track with me.  I will check in around the first of October and would love to hear any stories you have to share.

I am attaching some pictures from the birthday fun we had earlier this week.  Enjoy!

Miraculously Blessed,

Jessica

                            

The price of procrastination

Dear Ones –

I am a procrastinator.  There, I’ve said.  But it’s not totally accurate.  I am becoming a reformed procrastinator.  As a mom I just don’t have the luxury of procrastination.  Well, I can, but things do tend to fall apart when mom puts too many things off.

The only area I can really get away with it is regarding things that have to do with me.    But I am here to tell you this morning that as a mom we should NOT be procrastinating on ourselves.  In fact, as a person we should not procrastinate on the things we need.  We all function better when we are well taken care of.  We are more patient generous people.

So, the big question is, why don’t we take care of ourselves?  My current example…yesterday for (and I have to say that I am ashamed to admit this) the first time in years I went to the dentist to have my teeth cleaned.  This was NOT a fun experience.  I have lingual braces cemented on my bottom front teeth.  They were covered in tarter…YUCK.  So, I was poked and prodded and my teeth were scraped and scraped and scraped.  And today I still hurt.  Which clearly says to me that I am paying a big price for my procrastination.  The price of pain.  Needless to say, my next teeth cleaning is already scheduled for 6 months from now.  And why hadn’t I faced this particular area?  Simply because I kept putting it off.  I had insurance to cover it.  I had time.  I just put it off.  Maybe because of fear of what they would find.  Maybe because after you put things off so long you feel ashamed and don’t want to face it.  For me it was a multitude of reasons like that.

Certainly there are other things I have been putting off.  And today I am making a list of those things.  I need to know where I am going to have to “Cowboy Up” and face some more pain.  But oh, the excitement in thinking about being on the other side.   Maybe I will be sharing with you some other areas I have been procrastinating on and the price I’ve had to pay because of it.  In the meantime, it would be oh-so-helpful in my pain to have you share areas you either need to conquer or have already moved past.  Nobody likes being alone.

Here are a few basic things just on the top of my head to do.  Are any of them on your list?
Make appointments
Return or Renew library books
Put the kids clean clothes from vacation away
Pack books for move
Go grocery shopping
Make a few phone calls to catch up with people I haven’t talked to in a while

Matthew 6:33-34 But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.  Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.

I refuse to get stressed about the things I have procrastinated on.  I am going to allow these things to become a praise to my Maker as I accomplish them.  I will do what I can do today because He has made me more than able.  In trusting and seeking Him I will find the time, strength and energy to see it through.  May you find yourself in this place to.  May your doing be praises to Him.

Miraculously Blessed,

Jessica

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